July 5th,
2014
As I type this, I’m
hanging out in Logan Canyon on a sunny evening, sitting in a camp chair in the
shade of our pop-up, with wildflowers and pretty weeds tickling the backs of my
knees. The words appear on the screen between sips of beer. Lola is sprawled
out in the wild grass to my right, Charlie sitting next to me with sunglasses
on his head while he peers at the pages of his book through reading glasses.
Today I sent Trench Warfare. It’s a big deal, and at the same time it means
absolutely nothing. I’m not talking about the significance of rock climbing in
the whole scheme of the universe, or even about the nothingness of climbing
5.13 in a 5.15 world. I’m just talking about my own experience, because when it
comes down to it, that’s all I have.
Charlie likes to quote
Abraham Maslow, “It’s a random universe to which we bring meaning.” It’s one of
the 927 (or is it 928?) ultimate truths. It’s one a lot of us humans have a
really hard time with, especially those who subscribe to a belief system that
tells them otherwise. It can be tough to stomach the idea that things are just
what or as they are, and that the only higher purpose for our little existence
is the one we assign it. The thought that the pieces form a whole, but that
whole isn’t a picture of something we identify with or relate to can be alarming.
It puts the ownness on the individual and calls each of us to be accountable
for the quality of our own lives. We get to decide who we are, and why. In all
of this randomness, the being and becoming, the art of living the life I’ve
been dealt…that’s the meaning I bring.
So yes, Trench Warfare
is a big deal for me. But really it means nothing.
Charlie also likes to
celebrate a send with Nietzsche, “The melancholy of all things finalized…” Melancholy?
Maybe for a moment, but done is done, and before you can say
“doppelganger” the whole process begins all over again. It's an upward spiral.
“You know what the
difference is between you and me? I make this look good.”
~Men in Black (and
Chuck Odette)